My Mother Taught Me

[AlabamaNomadRider]

1.. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA ..
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16.. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23.. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favorite:

25.. My mother taught me about JUSTICE .
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !"

[BudMan]

Those all sound very familiar

[todd1960]

What I wouldn't give to hear my mom say those things again. Miss you mom RIP.

[AlabamaNomadRider]

Todd I'm with you on missing Mom. Lost mine in 1977 and my Dad in 1988.

[todd1960]

lost mine in 1996 she was only 68 way to young!

[sneedvegas]

Lost my Mom in 2007, way too early at the age of 60. Wished I could hear more of her wisdom.

[stumpy]

I love those sayings sounds just like my mom talking to me

[AlabamaNomadRider]

This may be the lighter side but it can also be used for other purposes. Sorry to hear of the losses of your parents. My Mom died peacefully in her sleep in 1977 at 71 and that was way too young. Dad died in 1988 at age 83. He was a world of knowledge for me and I sure miss being able to talk to him and get advice on something.

[fish]

so true so true,
Lost Mon in 1990 at age 68
Lost Pop in 2000 at age 80
then one day I woke up and thought I'm all alone now. and Mon must be a saint by now.

[BudMan]

Originally Posted by fish

then one day I woke up and thought I'm all alone now.

I know what you mean. My mother died in 85' at the age of 45
My father 7 years later at the age of 54. I was 31.
I was married and had two small daughters and still felt alone in a way. May they all RIP.