Why I fired my secretary

Loafer · 02-23-2013, 05:03 PM

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
"Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday."
I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said,
"Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!"
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"
We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She choose instead a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two Martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, do we?"
I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,
"Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back."
"Okay," I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake.
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy birthday".
And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Sobbing...
Naked...
and erect.

**Kawhead** · 02-23-2013, 06:25 PM

And who among us hasn't found ourselves in a similar predicament?

**ringadingh** · 02-23-2013, 09:14 PM

Unfortunately it seems I have very dull birthdays....

AlabamaNomadRider · 02-27-2013, 08:07 PM

Haven't been there or done that one yet.

NRiderUSA · 02-27-2013, 08:18 PM

Ouch.......

02-23-2013, 05:03 PM	#1
Loafer Sr. Contributor Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 18,287	Why I fired my secretary Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... They will remember. My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!" We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She choose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two Martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, do we?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner." After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back." "Okay," I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake. Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy birthday". And I just sat there... On the couch... Sobbing... Naked... and erect. __________________ Gerry Martineau / 802 VT / VBA #0892 /[email]glmjgm@gmail.com[email]

02-23-2013, 06:25 PM	#2
Kawhead Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: 6th Floor up at the The Nervous Hospital up in East Central State, NC Posts: 7,454	And who among us hasn't found ourselves in a similar predicament? __________________ ??-Mar.2,2012 "Rocky" My Beloved Dog RIP Mike Tripp VBA#767 '96 800 Vulcan Classic 06 1600 Nomad 07 1600 Nomad "The shoes you buy at the Salvation Army is already been broke in"- Aunt Kawhead

02-23-2013, 09:14 PM	#3
ringadingh Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Newmarket Ontario Canada Posts: 35,387	Unfortunately it seems I have very dull birthdays.... __________________ 2002 Nomad aka Bountyhunter VBA #27 VROC #18951

02-27-2013, 08:07 PM	#4
AlabamaNomadRider Sr. Contributor Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Boaz, Alabama Posts: 13,742	Haven't been there or done that one yet. __________________ Gene Cross, Jr. Boaz, Alabama KawaNOW/VBA #1181

02-27-2013, 08:18 PM	#5
NRiderUSA Sr. Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Missouri Posts: 3,781	Ouch....... __________________ NRiderUSA "Rick" "In times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." 1946 George Orwell