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Old 05-14-2011, 06:57 AM   #1
recumbentbob   recumbentbob is offline
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

The top 31 things that you will never hear a southern boy say:

31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.

29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

28. Duct tape won't fix that.

27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken

26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

25. You can't feed that to the dog.

24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

23. Wrestling is fake.

22. We're vegetarians.

21. Do you think my gut is too big?

20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

14. Trim the fat off that steak.

13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

12. The tires on that truck are too big.

11. I don't have a tool box on my truck .

10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

7. Checkmate

6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

4. I don't have a favorite college team.

3. You Guys.

2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.


AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:


1. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving!
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Old 05-14-2011, 07:11 AM   #2
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

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Old 05-14-2011, 07:55 AM   #3
Cajunrider   Cajunrider is offline
 
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

One they forgot: "You can't shoot deer at night, that's illegal."
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Old 05-14-2011, 10:20 AM   #4
AlabamaNomadRider   AlabamaNomadRider is offline
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

Wrestling is fake, I have to trim the fat off the steak and I love unsweetened tea.

But the list is funny.
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Old 05-14-2011, 10:32 AM   #5
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Old 05-14-2011, 05:15 PM   #6
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

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Old 05-14-2011, 07:36 PM   #7
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The top 31 things that you will never hear a south

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Old 05-16-2011, 11:10 AM   #8
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Old 05-16-2011, 12:29 PM   #9
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