12 yr olds

[canedriver]

I volunteered to have my twin brothers son stay the summer with me.

HMMMM what to do with him.

I know let's go deep sea fishing since he has expressed an interest.

Bait his hook, show him how to use the rod and reel, drop the line, and BAM insta fish. Kid reels it in and I show him how to take the fish off the hook. Repeat process (I still havent got my hook in the water) and BAM insta fish again. He reels it in and just stares at the fish for a few minutes. I tell him "I showed you how to do it now take the fish off the hook" he looks me right in the eye and says I can't it's unsanitary.

Boat captain was walking by and doubled over in laughter.

Beginning to think he isn't related to me

Hmm he has never been on a bike before, let's take him for a motorcycle ride. Get him geared up take him around block a few times and he LOVES IT. Oh yeah we are going to get along just fine, I have high hopes for this kid. UNTIL i take him for a longer ride and I feel movement behind me. I check him and he is in the process of taking his helmet off at 60 mph Pull over and say wtf are you doing? His response "I cant see my phone to get on facebook and I have a message" When I ask where he planned to put the helmet once he got it off I got the I don't know look.

At this point I am pretty sure he isn't related to me at all.

Couple days later pretty little 14 yr old living on the street comes over to play video games with him. She gets rdy to leave and goes to give him a hug and he looked a bit green. She walks out and i said whats wrong? I didn't know what she was doing when she grabbed me.

Ok now I know we aren't related.

SIGH ok lets go to the beach. Beaches are safe. He can play with kids his own age, do some swimming, (with unsanitary fish) and pretty much do what he wants as i read a book, drink a beer, and watch the interesting scenery.

Sitting in my chair I notice he is standing by the water looking at a woman who is swimming in the water. He is totally oblivious to what's around him. Walk over to him and ask "James what are you staring at"

His response at 12 yrs old....
I saw her when she took her clothes off and you can see everything in that white bikini, I am waiting to see what happens when she gets out of the water and it's wet.

I love this devious kid.

Yep we are related.

Signed him up for a class that starts July 9th to get him Scuba certified. He doesnt know it yet but the pretty little 14 yr old who likes him is going with him This should be fun.

[AlabamaNomadRider]

Very good story. Sounds like a lot of kids that age.

[jandreu]

Kids can be fun, sounds like you have your hands full.

[crazygene49]

Awesome!

[ponch]

I often feel that way about my own son...I guess he takes after his mom. He's actually a good guy, but needs to put a little mileage on the clock.

[toy4bob]

Thanks for the post Cane, cracked me up!

[2x18wheeler]

[canedriver]

Originally Posted by ponch

He's actually a good guy, but needs to put a little mileage on the clock.

I told him that after reading it. He is doing internet searches on his phone to try and figure out what you mean.

I am not blessed with children so this is a different experience for me. usually I just ship them home after a weekend of various activities. This is a definite eye opener having one around this long.

I just found out he has been bribing all the girls in the neighborhood. I bought a 20 pack variety bag of chips 2 days ago. There is one bag left. "Hey James where are all the chips? His answer "ummmm The girls were hungry"



Just looked over at him and said hey you been riding the bike you need to go wash it.

Answer, That's your girlfriends job isn't it.

She is going to kill him

[ringadingh]

That was funny, theres hope for him yet.

[Loafer]

I sent that story to my sons (all in their mid 30's) they all had a great
laugh and reminded me of when one them (name being withheld)
graduated 6th grade. The next day he handed his mom an advertisement
for rubbers. Complete with photos and prices, he wanted her to take him
to the drugstore to make a purchase. After all he was going to start dating
older women now that he was headed for the Jr. / Sr. High School!

[canedriver]

Originally Posted by Loafer

I sent that story to my sons (all in their mid 30's) they all had a great
laugh and reminded me of when one them (name being withheld)
graduated 6th grade. The next day he handed his mom an advertisement
for rubbers. Complete with photos and prices, he wanted her to take him
to the drugstore to make a purchase. After all he was going to start dating
older women now that he was headed for the Jr. / Sr. High School!

Oh man I could imagine my parents reaction. My mom would have mortified and my dad would have yelled That's my boy

[Loafer]

Actually the wife ordered 'mail order' for him and didn't tell me about it for
a week or so. When she did tell me, I had a talk with the older two boys.
"There never should be a girl's father on my doorstep, asking me what I'm
going to do, to make things right". (Or something like that). Fortunately
those two didn't, the youngest one......................

[canedriver]

I had the talk after he got here. I was a bit blunt. When the girls father is done with you I will carve your testicles out with an ice cream scoop. Turned beet red and laughed. I just sat there and stared at him. Took about a minute for the sputtering to stop and him to say wait, what, your serious?

He has having a blast during this little rain storm we are having. He has never been in a tropical storm or hurricane before. Most of the block is having tropical storm parties I love Florida

[ponch]

Originally Posted by canedriver

I had the talk after he got here. I was a bit blunt. When the girls father is done with you I will carve your testicles out with an ice cream scoop. Turned beet red and laughed. I just sat there and stared at him. Took about a minute for the sputtering to stop and him to say wait, what, your serious?

He has having a blast during this little rain storm we are having. He has never been in a tropical storm or hurricane before. Most of the block is having tropical storm parties I love Florida

There are two methods I like when beaus come calling: One, "all I have is a shovel and shotgun and no one will miss your sorry ass" and two, I escort my daughter and beau out the front door and put a hot dog on the porch railing and smash it with hammer. I then tell the boy, "she better be home on time".