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#1 |
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A cowboy named Bud..
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes , RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASApage on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany . Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep....... Now give me back my dog. .
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Mike "WOMPUS' Nieznany 1999 Nomad "Fronkensteen" Viet Nam Vet 68-69-70 KawaNOW #00577 I'm sarcastic and have a smart ass attitude. It's a natural defense against DRAMA, BULLSHIT & STUPIDITY!! |
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#2 |
Sr. Contributor
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 18,287
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A cowboy named Bud..
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#3 |
![]() Join Date: May 2009
Location: Greenwood, Ark.
Posts: 4,736
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A cowboy named Bud..
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Dave Jesse 2012 1700 Gray/Black Voyager 2006 1600 Nomad Green/Silver Sold VBA #1108 2010- Eureka Springs - Antlers - 2011- Maggie Valley - Antlers 2012- Margaritaville Ride - Van Buren - Antlers - 2013- Estes Park - Antlers 2014- Mountain View - Antlers - 2015- Eureka Springs - Antlers 2016- Salem - Antlers - 2017- Eureka Springs - Lake George - Antlers - 2018- Custer - Antlers |
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#4 |
![]() Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Peoples Republic of New York State
Posts: 15,154
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A cowboy named Bud..
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Tim "TC" Conley VBA #9 2011 Victory Kingpin mine 2013 Victory Boardwalk -hers [LEFT][COLOR=#000000] [SIZE=4] |
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#5 |
Sr. Contributor
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A cowboy named Bud..
Now that was funny.
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Gene Cross, Jr. Boaz, Alabama KawaNOW/VBA #1181 |
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#6 |
Sr. Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Cheltenham , Penna.
Posts: 1,091
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A cowboy named Bud..
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#7 |
![]() Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Newmarket Ontario Canada
Posts: 35,387
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A cowboy named Bud..
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2002 Nomad aka Bountyhunter VBA #27 VROC #18951 |
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#8 |
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: McComb, MS
Posts: 309
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A cowboy named Bud..
The hell with smileys!
Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
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"Growing old takes time. Use it wisley." |
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#9 |
Sr. Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Scottown ohio
Posts: 1,225
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A cowboy named Bud..
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Everyday is a holiday when you love your job, And if you don't you live in a nightmare. |
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#10 |
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Lancaster County, PA
Posts: 261
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A cowboy named Bud..
Now that's one worth sharing.
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