Innocence!

[oledawg]

A Time For Innocence Kids simple innocent replies to complicated questions.



Children's Science Exam



Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.



Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.



Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.



Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this !)
A: Keep it in the cow.



Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.



Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.



Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes?
A: Premature death.



Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.



Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome .



Q: What does the word "benign" mean?'

A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.



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A six year o ld goes to the hospital with his grandma to visit his grandpa.
"Grandpa, Grandpa," he says excitedly, make a noise like a frog!"
"What?" said his grandpa.
"Make a noise like a frog because grandma said that as soon as you croak, we're going to Disneyland!!!"



_____________________



Subject: All about Angels explained by Children


I only know the names of two angels. Hark and Harold.--Gregory, 5



It's not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to heaven, and then there's still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes. --Matthew, 9



Angels don't eat, but they drink milk from Holy Cows. --Jack, 6



When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath, somewhere there's a tornado. --Reagan, 10



Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter. --Jared, 8



Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets.
And if they don't make the animals get better, they help the child get over it. --Vicki, 8



What I don't get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them. --Sarah, 7
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I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident.



Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite toys. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water.



After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home.



My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!' My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up.



Then she says, 'Did it ever occur to you that the only place that baby can reach to get water is the toilet?' ::)

[dakals]

LMAO!!!!!!

[Yellow Jacket]

I bet Daddy deposited all that "tea" right back into the toilet!!!!

[ringadingh]

Those were goodies.

Priceless................

[justbrian]

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this !)
A: Keep it in the cow. ...........................that is great!