Poor Ralph

texasfisherdude · 10-14-2008, 03:01 PM

Poor Ralph

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph..'

Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'

St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'

Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'

'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm go nna explode!'

'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
'Don 't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '

'Never,' said Ralph.

'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'

Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!

Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell.....

Ralph! Wake up. You **** the bed!'

socwkbiker · 10-14-2008, 03:06 PM

LMAO!!!! You owe me a new keyboard and monitor!

mmartin · 10-14-2008, 06:16 PM

LMAO

Lesson learned; do not drink and read at the same time while reading some of this stuff, you could choke and waste a good beer.

dakals · 10-14-2008, 07:16 PM

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

basco · 10-14-2008, 09:37 PM

Again Ralph

**ringadingh** · 10-14-2008, 11:06 PM

Thats funny!

ridemslow · 10-17-2008, 05:18 PM

Almost as good as the guy who bowed out of the fishig trip, huh?

ianicky · 10-19-2008, 02:50 AM

Lmao thats funny

10-14-2008, 03:01 PM	#1
texasfisherdude Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Dickinson Texas Posts: 252	Poor Ralph Poor Ralph -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph..' Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!' St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.' Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?' 'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm go nna explode!' 'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don 't tell me you've never laid an egg before? ' 'Never,' said Ralph. 'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.' Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell..... Ralph! Wake up. You **** the bed!'

10-14-2008, 03:06 PM	#2
socwkbiker Top Contributor Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Jefferson City, MO Posts: 6,272	Poor Ralph LMAO!!!! You owe me a new keyboard and monitor! __________________ Jeff Platz VBA #0002 VBA VP-Global B.A.C.A. Hoss 2005 "StrongBear" Black/Silver Todd and BD

10-14-2008, 06:16 PM	#3
mmartin Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Arkansas/Mississippi Posts: 474	Poor Ralph LMAO Lesson learned; do not drink and read at the same time while reading some of this stuff, you could choke and waste a good beer.

10-14-2008, 07:16 PM	#4
dakals Sr. Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Beloit,WI Posts: 4,256	Poor Ralph ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

10-14-2008, 09:37 PM	#5
basco Sr. Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Taylor Tx Posts: 1,831	Poor Ralph Again Ralph

10-14-2008, 11:06 PM	#6
ringadingh Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Newmarket Ontario Canada Posts: 35,387	Poor Ralph Thats funny! __________________ 2002 Nomad aka Bountyhunter VBA #27 VROC #18951

10-17-2008, 05:18 PM	#7
ridemslow Sr. Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Chesapeake, Ohio Posts: 1,537	Poor Ralph Almost as good as the guy who bowed out of the fishig trip, huh? __________________

10-19-2008, 02:50 AM	#8
ianicky Sr. Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Somerset, England Posts: 1,131	Poor Ralph Lmao thats funny

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