Bad day for pussy.

mick56 · 02-24-2020, 04:40 PM

True story. A hot sunny day, and hard working bricklayer was driving on his way home from work. A black cat ran across the road, and he heard a thump. So thinking he had hit it, he stopped. Then walked back to see if he could help the poor animal. Looking on the grass to the left & right, he found the cat. It was just laying there in the long grass, motionless, but breathing really hard. Full of remorse, and not really knowing what to do, he decided it was best to put it out of its misery. He went back to his van and got a huge spanner. And so with great remorse, he twatted the cat over the head, and killed it. Almost immediately, a woman stuck her head over the fence of one of the houses that back onto the road. She started screaming at him, calling him a murderer, and saying she was going to call the police. After spending ages trying to assure her that he only did what he thought was best for the cat, he drove home.That night a policeman tapped his door. Having explained, the man was asked to come outside to look at his van. After opening the bonnet, the policeman shone his torch inside. Only to reveal, a pretty well fucked up black cat, wrapped around the alternator belts. It turned out that the other black cat, the one on the grass verge, was just snoring away in the sunshine. When it was twatted to death, with a 3/4 Whitworth socket and extension bar. Moral of the story. Never trust a black pussy. And allway's buy good quality tools.

ldhthept · 02-24-2020, 08:58 PM

You simply must take the time when you are sober to do some research on the definition of humor, true story.

duffy · 02-25-2020, 03:00 PM

Love your humor Mick........a bit on the dark side but I still love it.

mick56 · 02-25-2020, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duffy

Love your humor Mick........a bit on the dark side but I still love it.

I cracked up the first time i read it.

mick56 · 02-29-2020, 02:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ldhthept

You simply must take the time when you are sober to do some research on the definition of humor, true story.

Bollocks to you too. You miserable bastard

02-24-2020, 04:40 PM	#1
mick56 Sr. Member Join Date: Nov 2013 Location: The Newforest, England Posts: 4,664	Bad day for pussy. True story. A hot sunny day, and hard working bricklayer was driving on his way home from work. A black cat ran across the road, and he heard a thump. So thinking he had hit it, he stopped. Then walked back to see if he could help the poor animal. Looking on the grass to the left & right, he found the cat. It was just laying there in the long grass, motionless, but breathing really hard. Full of remorse, and not really knowing what to do, he decided it was best to put it out of its misery. He went back to his van and got a huge spanner. And so with great remorse, he twatted the cat over the head, and killed it. Almost immediately, a woman stuck her head over the fence of one of the houses that back onto the road. She started screaming at him, calling him a murderer, and saying she was going to call the police. After spending ages trying to assure her that he only did what he thought was best for the cat, he drove home.That night a policeman tapped his door. Having explained, the man was asked to come outside to look at his van. After opening the bonnet, the policeman shone his torch inside. Only to reveal, a pretty well fucked up black cat, wrapped around the alternator belts. It turned out that the other black cat, the one on the grass verge, was just snoring away in the sunshine. When it was twatted to death, with a 3/4 Whitworth socket and extension bar. Moral of the story. Never trust a black pussy. And allway's buy good quality tools. __________________ when this you see, remember me, and bear me in your mind, let all the world say what they may, speak of me as you find. Last edited by mick56; 02-25-2020 at 10:26 AM.

02-24-2020, 08:58 PM	#2
ldhthept Sr. Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Tallahassee FL Posts: 1,032	You simply must take the time when you are sober to do some research on the definition of humor, true story.

02-25-2020, 03:00 PM	#3
duffy Sr. Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Hot Springs, SD and other warm and dry places Posts: 1,043	Love your humor Mick........a bit on the dark side but I still love it.